Amazon

Friday, January 25, 2013

My Favorite Heaven-Bent Blog Posts from 2012


While I enjoyed my book and movie reviews 
(including the incredibly popular post: Shark Movies), 
as well as my writing advice, 
encouraging/inspirational posts, 
and my own recipes, 
I must say that these are ...

 My Favorite
Heaven-Bent Blog Posts
from 2012

by Dean Burkey


and it's even funnier sequel:

The Perfect Plan: Foiled! (Part 2)

 I enjoyed those two, 
because I think that was the first time 
I wrote a crazy story for a blog (part 1 anyway) 
based on something from my life. 
I merely exaggerated the events to create the comedy. 
I enjoyed part 2 
if only because of the silly picture I made as shown above. 
At the very least, 
these two posts inspired me to write crazy stories 
as if they actually happened to me. 
Such as ... 


Photo Sources:
My sampling of http://modernmarketingjapan.blogspot.com/2011/06/stunning-revelation-tokyo-man-grows.html, http://www.michael-jackson-photos.com/, and http://elvis-presley-fanclub.blogspot.com/2010_08_01_archive.html.

 Jacko, Elvis, and The Albino Bigfoot

 If only because of the silly picture 
I put together as shown above! 
But also, I think this was my first time 
teaming with either Elvis or Michael Jackson. 
Although technically, 
we didn't interact in that adventure. 
But we sure did in my favorite post(s) of all time, 
if only because of its epic nature, my 6-part post ...



Is This Really The End?

 This is my favorite, 
not only because of the 6-part epic quality, 
but also because of the cliffhangers 
at the end of the first 5 posts. 
Sometimes, even I didn't know 
what was going to happen next! 
Plus, I got to hang out with Elvis and Jacko, 
which is always fun. 
I enjoy hanging out with celebrities, real or imagined; 
and I also enjoy sci-fi adventures, 
like this one ...


Time-Traveling with Hollywood Hunks

 Fun, because I used actual photographs 
from the Civil War where certain soldiers back then 
looked like famous actors from today! 
Which, believe it or not, 
made my unbelievable story believable. 
Or not.


My secret favorite ... 

This Is Crazy! A Call Me Maybe Exposé

 Fun, because I listened to the song backwards 
and made note of whatever weird phrases I heard. 
This one got a lot of hits too! 
So why is this my secret favorite? 
It's all so silly. (Like many of my posts are.) 
Plus, perhaps, I'm embarrassed 
that I like that song as much as I do. 

 So those are 
My Favorite Heaven-Bent Blog Posts from 2012. 
At least the ones that I can think of. 
In a way, all of them are my favorite, 
or I wouldn't post them. 
(Unless I'm in a hurry 
and have to post something!)

 These have all been works of comedy/parody.

 Thank you for joining me on my adventures! 
And welcome to you if you're new!

 Blessings & Joy,
Dean










Currently* FREE* on Amazon Kindle:

 
 
 
 


Click Here for More Currently* FREE* Kindle Books!

Click Here for Some** Currently* FREE* MP3 Downloads!
* The prices for these books (and most** of the MP3s) were FREE at the time of this posting, but the prices are subject to change at any time, so be sure to get your FREE copies while you can. Just be sure the book listing says "Kindle Price: $0.00". If the price has gone up, some of these aren't that costly in the first place anyway.

Even if you don't have a Kindle, you can still enjoy these FREE books by clicking the FREE Kindle Reading Apps banner above.

** Not all the MP3s listed are free, so check the price before buying.
Posted by at No comments:
Labels: , , , , , , ,

Friday, January 18, 2013

Currently FREE on Amazon!

I need to concentrate on ways and means of making money, so today's post is merely a re-posting of today's Heaven-Bent post:



These first two might be fun 
for your kids, grand kids, nieces, nephews, 
and maybe even you!

Book Description

Publication Date: October 21, 2012
Looking for fun jokes for your kids? Jokes and riddles are a wonderful way for children to practice their memorization and presentation skills. Sharing jokes with their family, they will gain confidence and have fun!

Jokes and humorous stories, such as the ones found in this report, will encourage reading and recitation, not to mention that they are a fun way to spend time with the family. In addition, the thought involved in joke delivery and comprehension is no laughing matter. To be great at humor, a child must think critically and be able to make the associations drawn by a good joke.

Puns, riddles, and knock-knocks aren't just fun, they're important learning and development tools.

“Jokes for Kids: 300+ Jokes for Kids to Have Fun and Kill Time” have rib-tickling jokes about:

Food
School
Animals
Monsters and Zombies
At the Doctor
Family
Christmas Time
Scary Things
Pirates

Hurry! Have a copy of this book and have fun listening to kid’s jokes!

Article Source: http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B009UKX2LA


Book Description

Publication Date: August 16, 2012
"Rubber baby buggy bumpers" - Say this three times as fast as you can. How about, try saying " Loopy lizards lying lazily aloft a little lane of logs," without messing up. This Tongue Twister book is huge collection of funny phrases, ridiculous rhymes, and silly sentences that will have kids laughing for hours. Each one challenges your mouth muscles as you try to say these tongue twisters faster and multiple times.

A tongue twister is a phrase that is supposed to be difficult to articulate properly. Often times they take practice to say correctly. Tongue twisters are good practice for children as they learn to form words, phrases, and vowels. It's hard to say a tongue twister without a smile on your face. Each tongue twister in this book has it's own silly illustration. Kids will be entertained with these tongue twisters for hours.

Article Source: http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B008YYLYVS

These next two 
should help you become a healthier you!


Book Description

Publication Date: July 5, 2012
Best Ab Exercises is not like most abdominal workout books out there--in fact, it does not contain a single traditional "crunch" or "sit-up" type exercise.

Indeed, the weakness in many workout routines that target your core is that a lot of those exercises work your stomach in near isolation. This is nothing like the way your abdomen and lower back operate in real life.

In a real-life situation, your core muscles work with other major muscle groups to provide stability and control for your whole body. That means that in your workouts, it's important to have your stomach and your back working together with those other muscle groups for optimal results.

That's what makes Best Ab Exercises different. The exercises you will learn in this book engage the major muscle groups in your upper or lower body (or both, depending on the specific exercise) while simultaneously working your core. The result is a more complete and effective ab routine that burns more fat, builds more muscle, and actually makes you stronger.

And let's not forget a vital component here—a core workout must involve not only your stomach but also your lower back. This book contains everything you need to know to work and stretch your lower back in addition to your abs, to maximize strength and minimize the risk of injury and lower back pain.

You'll learn a full range of different exercises, complete with detailed descriptions and pictures to ensure clarity and good form, that can challenge anyone, from a pure beginner to an experienced athlete.

A good core workout is absolutely essential. Whether your goal is to look better, get stronger, or just be healthier in general, effective ab exercises need to be a priority.

So pick up a physical or digital copy of Best Ab Exercises today—you'll learn an abdominal exercise routine you can keep using for the rest of your life.

Article Source: http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B008HYK2V8


Book Description

Publication Date: September 7, 2012
Glutathione - The effects and benefits of glutathione are so numerous, having a positive effect on all diseases and yet people know so little about it.

This book was written to educate you on the one, most natural, most effective and yet completely non-toxic element you can add to your daily health regime to help and often get rid of: virus (yes, even HIV and Herpes), infection, inflammation, heart disease, cancer, diabetes, nerve disorders like Parkinson's and Alzheimer's, Chronic Fatigue and the list goes on.

Mastering the optimization of your health has never been easier. It's only a matter of being informed

Article Source: http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B0097S74OQ

Maybe healthy isn't what you're into; 
in which case, the next two 
will be perfect for you.


Book Description

Publication Date: January 30, 2012
In tough times sometimes it's soothing to allow ourselves a delicious and decedent sweet treat.  And, we also want to stay healthy.  This cookbook was created to both satisfy your sweet tooth and your desire to stay slender.

From moist chocolate pudding cake, to mouth-watering Key Lime Pie, this cookbook is chock full of recipes that will satisfy you and your calorie count.

These recipes have been collected and tested by our family and friends for the best flavor and being easy and quick to make.  You'll love the recipe for Lisa's Chocolate Berry Tarts (my favorite), and Creamy Chocolate Cheesecake Brownies.  As you look through the table of contents, you'll have a hard time deciding what to make first!

Whether you want to make some simple afternoon snacks, or an magnificent dinner party show-stopper, these easy-to-make recipes will satisfy that sweet tooth while fitting into a healthy eating plan.

Each recipe has complete nutritional information.

So enjoy life! Scroll up and click "Buy Now" and enjoy scrumptious low-calorie desserts today!

Article Source: http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B0073X6EP2


Book Description

Publication Date: March 16, 2012
Are you sick of buying big, expensive style books only to find a handful of pages that are relevant for you? Would you like to receive specific, tailored style advice that feels like it was written just for you?

Well, if you have a pear shaped body and you want to know exactly how to dress to flatter your shape you’re in luck. Every page of this book will be relevant for you. And it doesn’t matter what dress size you are. Whether you’re a petite pear, a curvy pear or a plus size pear, the same focal points and balance recommendations apply.

We say it often, because it’s worth repeating: it’s the FIT of your clothes that’s important to looking good, it’s NOT your size.

Jenna Halston and master dressmaker Robyn Roberts have created what could be the ultimate style guide for women with a pear shaped body. The book is packed full of easy to follow “golden rules” and straightforward tips, all based on the science of looking fabulous. Then they take it up a notch with a series of practical steps to help you edit your wardrobe and become a better shopper.
Read it through and you’ll be channeling your inner fashionista in no time.

This book is your secret weapon to looking sharper, sleeker and more sophisticated. Embrace it, walk tall, and get started on a new chapter in your life’s adventure.

Article Source: http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B007LS3SFS

Although I can't imagine 
why anyone wouldn't want FREE books, 
maybe you don't want any of these books; 
in which case, the following book 
may be worth your look.


Book Description

Publication Date: March 29, 2012

Can’t say no?


You want to say no. You need to say no. But somehow you just can’t seem to do it. Maybe you owe someone. Maybe you’re feeling guilty putting yourself first – after all, don’t good people sacrifice for others? Or you can’t stand to disappoint your parents. How do you say nowithout feeling guilty – when there are so many “good” reasons to give in?

At some point, we’ve all struggled with how to set boundaries. No one likes conflict. No one wants to hurt or disappoint anyone. And we want to please others. But sometimes we sacrifice too much – and find ourselves feeling angry and resentful.


Dealing with Difficult People


Setting boundaries isn’t easy. In this simple, practical book, Stephanie Sterner reveals seven strategies for handling difficult people. And while many authors are content to fill their books with general advice, Stephanie has packed this guide with concrete examples of how to set boundaries gracefully.

Standing up for yourself can improve even your toughest relationships. That’s why Stephanie clarifies the concepts behind each option. Parroting someone else’s words is not enough; you need to choose the best response for your particular situation. You will finally be able to express your limits simply and clearly – and stick to them when the controlling, manipulation and guilt trips start. And the more you stand up for yourself, the more your self-esteem will soar.


How would it feel …?


Imagine making the choices you really want to make … and feeling comfortable doing so. No more need for the approval or agreement of others. (Of course, you can still consider their input.) No more resenting them for persuading you to do something “against your better judgment.” You’d feel stronger, more confident. And you’d lead a more fulfilling life – because your decisions would be supporting your highest values, not someone else’s.


There are so many books. Why this one?


Many authors tell you what limits to set and how to set them. Some have even created systems: formulas for you to follow whenever you need to say no. But these instructions are based on the authors’ values, not yours. And they don’t provide the understanding you need in order to choose your words – or handle the inevitable objections. With this deeper understanding, you no longer need to give in to pressure. You’ll no longer stand by helplessly, watching others ignore your wants and needs.

This concise guide does what many longer books fail to do. It shows you how you’ve unconsciously handed your power to others – and gives you plenty of ways to reclaim it, one boundary at a time. You will quickly understand the principles behind each approach, what it will accomplish and where it may fall short. You’ll be able to choose for yourself what to say and how to say it. After all, you’re the one who has to live with the consequences of your words. Wouldn’t you rather be empowered to select them yourself?

Stephanie wrote this book because she has lived it. She has personally faced the obstacles to standing up for herself. And she has helped clients to do the same. Because she cannot help everyone individually, she wants you to learn from her experience. She wants to give you a short-cut to the wisdom that comes from years of learning and applying the lessons of life.

Few books offer you so much in such a short space. This is a must-read for anyone who feels guilty or uncomfortable setting appropriate boundaries … even if it’s only sometimes.

Set your boundaries your way … because it’s your life.


Article Source: http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B007Q13W7O

* The prices for these books were FREE at the time of this posting, but the prices are subject to change at any time, so be sure to get your FREE copies while you can. Just be sure the listing says "Kindle Price: $0.00". If the price has gone up, some of these aren't that costly in the first place anyway.

Even if you don't have a Kindle, you can still enjoy these FREE books by clicking the FREE Kindle Reading Apps banner below.

Blessings & Joy,

Posted by at No comments:
Labels: , , , , , , , , , , ,

Friday, January 11, 2013

My Favorite Michael Jackson Songs







Uploaded on Oct 2, 2009 by
michaeljacksonVEVO
Music video by Michael Jackson performing Heal The World. 
(C) 1991 MJJ Productions Inc.

Not just my favorite Michael Jackson song, 
but my favorite song.
Powerful, yet soothing, inspiring song.


Man in the Mirror



Uploaded on Oct 2, 2009 by
michaeljacksonVEVO
Music video by Michael Jackson performing Man in the Mirror. 
(C) 1987 MJJ Productions Inc.

Another inspiring song!
I like this one especially, because when I first heard it, 
I thought Michael sang "The Man in the Middle" 
about Jesus on the cross. 
Later, I found out how he sang "The Man in the Mirror".
Later, I realized that meant I could write a song 
called "The Man in the Middle"; and so I did.


I'll Be There


Uploaded on Jun 27, 2009 by
JorgeAryana

Technically, that's a Jackson 5 song, 
but that is Michael singing lead. 
Such a cool, comforting song. 
Especially when you think of Jesus 
as The One Who Is always here for us.


My secret favorite ... 

Uploaded on Oct 2, 2009 by
michaeljacksonVEVO
Music video by Michael Jackson performing Black Or White. 
(C) 1991 MJJ Productions Inc.


Good message about the races getting along.

High energy song!
With such a cool guitar riff!
So's why my secret fave?
(The beginning of the video's kind of freaky: 
Macaulay Culkin rebels against Norm?)



Dean

 
Posted by at No comments:
Labels: ,

Friday, January 4, 2013

My Favorite Bad Advice from Dove Chocolate Candy Wrappers


My Favorite
Bad Advice from 
Dove Chocolate Candy Wrappers



Not every fortune cookie offers the wisest advice. Case in point being: “He who laughs last doesn’t make for a fun date.” 

 I saw this hot girl at one of my shows; only she laughed much later than everyone else. Having just enjoyed Hunan cuisine that afternoon, I heeded that silly advice and didn’t ask her out. 

 Turns out she was a European chocolate factory heiress. She laughed last, because she waited for her translator. 

 I missed out on my dream woman, because I heeded the dictates of an after-dinner pastry!

 In the same manner, even the well-meaning, often awe-inspiring, phrases found inside the foil wrappers of Dove Chocolate candies can be little suspect. 

 Some, downright disastrous! 

“Lose yourself in a moment.” 

 That’s such bad advice, that U2 sang a song about it! 

U2 - Stuck In A Moment You Can't Get Out Of HQ

Uploaded on Nov 7, 2009 by

That guy lost himself in a moment; and his whole life passed him by. 

 Another warped witticism inscribed on the inside of a Dove wrapper sounds spot on. 

“Live your dreams.” 

 Sounds great; doesn’t it? 

 Until you remember the dream where you’re being chased by serial killers and land sharks, but you can only move in slow motion. 

 Or the one with the Tarantula eating the Golden Gate Bridge. 

 (I blame that one on a classic sci-fi marathon and an undercooked burrito.) 

And these two wretched ones!
“Ignite your sense of adventure.” 
& 
“Don’t settle for a spark 
… light a fire instead.”

 In retrospect, I should’ve eaten those two candies on break at work. 

 My attempt to fulfill my candy-wrapper-inspired destiny got me fired, destroyed a city block, and made me the subject of a lawsuit by Carman, Morgan, & Burnetti. 

 Which inspired me to create a new ad slogan for the fine folks at Dove: 


Dove Chocolate: 
Lousy Advice; Delicious Candy.

Dean

For more Dove Chocolate Candy Wrapper fun, 
check out my previous post: 





Posted by at No comments:
Labels: , , , , ,
Subscribe to: Posts (Atom)